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Time for Marrage?

 

Salam Alaykoum,

I dont view myself as a great writer. And honestly dont post or chat much. So I suppose i will start by briefly introducing myself. I am ****, a 30 year old single male (emphesis on single). I am a computer technician for a Cyber Cafe in **** Morocco, we have 10 computers and are in process of expanding to 16. I repair, maintain and format computers for a vast quantity of people. I would say I format about 10 to 15 computers a month and repair an equal amount. Do network installations and house calls for computer service and ADSL modem installations. And I provide other services... Is a good job and I am happy to be business partners with the people that I am with.

 

I speak, read and Write english.

I read French well.

I speak simple arabic, still learning.

 

But on the other side of this coin. I am 30 years old. And single. All my brothers and sisters have married and have there families and children.

 

For me being single has become a problem. I will do my best to say it in a mannor readable to all audiances (male and female) and if at all possible add some humor.

 

I am lonely. My heart yerns for a companion. For a wife to hold, to love and have close to me. To be intimate.... (Pause and Fastforward, skipping the sceenes that are for the husband and wife) ;-)

 

These feelings become overwhelming. It is not just in my head. It is my whole body, Mind, Heart, Soul. It is all of me. Not just parts of me! (wink, wink)

 

So why am I writing this. Simple answer. Hoping and praying and asking Allah for... Well. A Wife. Not someone elses wife. But my very own wife. A wife that is a good muslim. With a good heart and is loving and honest and caring and sometimes a little noty, well maby a little more than sometimes. A wife who loves me for who I am and loves me simply and honestly. In good times and bad.

 

And it is Ramadan. I pray the early morning and night Taraweeh prayers. I pray and ask Allah to help with all things. To bless my parents with good place in Jennah. Allah knows how much I love them and miss them. To forgive me and help me and save me. To bless Mohammed (PBUH) and all the messengers. To help all of us Muslims and save us. And for Allah to bless me with a good wife and children. And much more...

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Do the websites work for searching for a husband/wife ? O_o

Not so sure, the better way is to meet families with their single women, right or wrong ?

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Do the websites work for searching for a husband/wife ? O_o

Not so sure, the better way is to meet families with their single women, right or wrong ?

It may work out for some folks, however it is not easy to really get to know about a person simply through the Internet. You can only go off of what they choose to tell you.

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Sure, I had been a little surprised when I read the answer of Saracen21stC 'try zawaj.com'  ^^"

(I'm sure it's impossible to know someone via Internet - except the correspondant students whom you meet at the end)

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If you have some arguments, I'm interested in reading them :)

 

Oh I'm not arguing for or against anything. I just think everything varies based on the individual, context, etc.

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Sure, I had been a little surprised when I read the answer of Saracen21stC 'try zawaj.com'  ^^"

(I'm sure it's impossible to know someone via Internet - except the correspondant students whom you meet at the end)

 

You see, he has posted this in an internet forum. So, I directed him to another source which has a lot of members. And yes! I also find it quite impossible to marry someone through internet. But you never know what happens in the future........

 

 

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You see, he has posted this in an internet forum. So, I directed him to another source which has a lot of members. And yes! I also find it quite impossible to marry someone through internet. But you never know what happens in the future........

 

 

 

I felt I had understood why you directed him to another more appropriate source. And you're right, no one knows his future, (then, maybe we will marry people from Uzbekistan !) *.*

Edited by Tea Spoon
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I felt I had understood why you directed him to another more appropriate source. And you're right, no one knows his future, (then, maybe we will marry people from Uzbekistan !) *.*

 

Uzbekistan? Why Uzbekistan. Personally, I know so little about Uzbekistan!

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Oh it was just an example taken by chance.

But...Uzbekistan, with Afghanistan, is the today's name of the Khorassan.

This area was a hothouse of Arabic-Muslim scientists and scholars before the middle age.

For instance Al Bukhari was from Bukhara in the today's Uzbekistan. The mathematician Al Khawarizmi was from the Khwarezm, an area in Iran, Uzbekistan and Turkmenistan I think.

There is a hadith which prophesies that the powerful state in the Middle Orient will be destroyed by the black flags from Khorassan

So maybe my mind didn't choose this country by chance ...

Edited by Tea Spoon
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I also find it quite impossible to marry someone through internet.

 

 

Well i got married with a man through internet. But let me say that i never planned such a thing!  :rolleyes: I was practising my English on an Islamic chat page online and there i met with this guy somehow and something made us be the one  :blush: Alhamdulillah, he and i both think we're made for each other. If we did not meet on internet, we could never have met anywhere else, because he was from the UK (though he is originally Turkish) and i was from Istanbul (and he is not originally from Istanbul, a very far city to Istanbul).

 

You never know what Allah shows you in the future. I can't even believe that this happened in my life. :)

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Well i got married with a man through internet. But let me say that i never planned such a thing!  :rolleyes: I was practising my English on an Islamic chat page online and there i met with this guy somehow and something made us be the one  :blush: Alhamdulillah, he and i both think we're made for each other. If we did not meet on internet, we could never have met anywhere else, because he was from the UK (though he is originally Turkish) and i was from Istanbul (and he is not originally from Istanbul, a very far city to Istanbul).

 

You never know what Allah shows you in the future. I can't even believe that this happened in my life. :)

Ah but you met him after and you tried to understand each other after the "correspondance" through Internet.

That's different I think, your case is nearly like the case of students penpals...the original goal is talking with one person and only this one for a given time to learn a language, a culture, or to work together, and in general they both meet, in general at the university, but they can meet on another place for a time, and who can know what could happen next ? only ALLAAH knows, that's true.

When we said that it's quite impossible o marry someone through internet, we were talking about those who register on dubious websites /in the first aim/ to meet someone.

You're lucky :)

I wish you a happy life inshaa ALLAAH

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Ah but you met him after and you tried to understand each other after the "correspondance" through Internet.

That's different I think, your case is nearly like the case of students penpals...the original goal is talking with one person and only this one for a given time to learn a language, a culture, or to work together, and in general they both meet, in general at the university, but they can meet on another place for a time, and who can know what could happen next ? only ALLAAH knows, that's true.

When we said that it's quite impossible o marry someone through internet, we were talking about those who register on dubious websites /in the first aim/ to meet someone.

You're lucky :)

I wish you a happy life inshaa ALLAAH

We tried to know each other via internet of course, because our countries were not the same, so it was not possible to travel so easily. You may guess it could be expensive and we both didnt know if we were true persons each other. So we got to know each other by time and after that he came to my city and we met for 2 days. After that he again came twice or third time in 1 year and stayed like 1 or 2 weeks. Of course it was so difficult to make some things when we were so far away, because i think it is not so easy to know a person without seeing... At this time people lie or pretend so easily, so the trust is catched after some time. Alhamdulillah we were true people for each other :) Thanks for your wish!

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We tried to know each other via internet of course, because our countries were not the same, so it was not possible to travel so easily. You may guess it could be expensive and we both didnt know if we were true persons each other. So we got to know each other by time and after that he came to my city and we met for 2 days. After that he again came twice or third time in 1 year and stayed like 1 or 2 weeks. Of course it was so difficult to make some things when we were so far away, because i think it is not so easy to know a person without seeing... At this time people lie or pretend so easily, so the trust is catched after some time. Alhamdulillah we were true people for each other :) Thanks for your wish!

 

:sl:

 

Do you guys now stay together in Istanbul? And What did your parents/relatives say? What did his parents/relatives say? how old is he and his education? I am a bit curious here. :-)

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Yes, we live in Istanbul. He moved here for the sake of me  :rolleyes: Relatives/parents issue is a very complex one but they are okay with our marriage :) His parents and all relatives LOVE me so much, alhamdulillah. He is graduated from university like me and 2 years older than me :) Lol i felt weird while giving all those info about me for no reason.  :ph34r:

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lol. The reason I asked the questions was to see how the culture accepts meeting-through-internet marriage. Also, the spouses living in UK and/or Turkey looked rather intriguing. You can say that I am doing a bit of a survey here so that I can help in my understanding of this type of marriage. :-). Thank you for your answers and it has truly been very unique.

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The fate belongs to God! Nobody knows what will happen. I met someone through a chat, he [and a good Muslim. We made plans to get married and he came to live in my country, but ... Istikhara when he did, it did not work. So our destiny is in the hands of Allah, he knows what is best for each of us. You might meet someone anywhere, if Allah is in agreement, will be blessed. Inshallah

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lol. The reason I asked the questions was to see how the culture accepts meeting-through-internet marriage. Also, the spouses living in UK and/or Turkey looked rather intriguing. You can say that I am doing a bit of a survey here so that I can help in my understanding of this type of marriage. :-). Thank you for your answers and it has truly been very unique.

Now i understand better why you have asked that all. :) Honestly, there were some family problems, because my husband's family were not so open-minded people, like they always get marry with their own relatives and it was so impossible for them to get marry with a person whom they don't know. They didn't try to get to know me, rather they rejected me for some years, but in the end they understood that we had to marry and i was not like a bad person. My family was more open-minded, they waited for them to come to our house and visit my parents but since we had some troubles with my husband's parents (especially his mum) my parents then began not to want this marriage. Now my husband's family love me a lot, but they didnt apologise for what they did in the past (though we are originally from the same country, our cultures are REALLY different and they have some wierd traditions like they didnt used to hug or play with their children/grandchildren in front of everyone, they never apologises etc. Because i am from Istanbul, my environment was always more modern and less traditional, my dad was an educated and a very good father, my mum was driving etc.), so my parents got angry on them.

 

I mean all the problems emerged because of my husband's mum and the other relatives, still we are trying to fix them all. It's really hard when you get married with someone who is from another culture. Cuz people judge you so easily. But love is so beautiful and worth to it. :)

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